Biting
This is part five in our series “Why Does My Baby Do That?!”. This post will cover biting and what you can do about it.
While some babies cut their first teeth at four months and others don’t get theirs until one year, the average is around six months old. How will you know if your baby has teeth coming in? Well, they may start drooling a lot more than usual. They may start chewing on their fingers or a toy more vigorously. And they may chomp down on a nipple. Ouch!
You might be thinking, “Doesn’t that mean that once a baby has teeth it’s time to stop nursing?” Well, no, that’s not necessarily true. A baby’s tongue actually extends over their gums and lower teeth while feeding at the breast so they shouldn’t be biting but actually massaging the breast to get the milk out. Do they occasionally bite the nipple that feeds them? Yes, unfortunately. Here’s what you need to know.
Biting hurts! Like, really, really hurts! Your baby needs to know that biting you is not ok, but also know that you are still the safe place, and comfort and nutrients can be found with you. If your baby bites, try if you can, to resist the urge to scream/yell/shriek because although you don’t want to be bitten, you probably don’t want to stop nursing completely. I know, I know, easier said than done. Yes, I’ve been bitten too, and it hurts like heck but yelling or shouting can make a baby uneasy and they may go through a bit of a nursing strike if they’re nervous that you will yell again while they’re having lunch. Some babies are more sensitive to this than others.
Most babies who are biting on purpose are a bit older and it’s often because they are getting teeth. Babies bite on things; fingers, a pacifier, a toy, a silicone kitchen spoon, etc because that pressure feels good on their gums.
Some babies bite down and quickly let go. Some babies bite down and keep biting. If your baby keeps biting, you can pull them in closer so their nose is pressed into the breast, a baby will usually let go with their mouth to take a breath and then you can release them. Just to clarify: I am NOT advocating for smothering your child, so don’t do that! I am just saying to pull them in closer for just a moment, it won’t take but a second or two for your baby to let go and pull their head back.
If your child is older than about five months or so and they bite, you can set them down and say, “No biting. Biting hurts and I won’t let you hurt my body.” Your baby will catch on that a bite means no more nursing (for the moment). Some babies laugh a few times because this might be a new reaction from you, but they quickly catch on. Do you remember that in part one of this series, when I told you that your baby is a genius? They’ll learn quickly that you are not going to tolerate being bitten.
Ok, ok fine, you say. But what can you do to prevent the biting in the first place? Well, let’s talk about that. Sometimes babies eat because they are hungry, sometimes they eat because they are overstimulated or need comfort or are bored (Sound familiar? Do you feel called out? I do!). If your baby isn’t really hungry and they just want to naw on something, give them a washcloth with a knot tied in it. Better yet, dip that knot in breastmilk or water, freeze it, and then give it to them. Or give them some kind of teething toy. My kids loved this toothbrush banana toy. Seriously, they would chew on it for 10 minutes at a time, which you know is like, forever for a baby. Now, all babies are unique individuals and you know your baby best, but in general if a baby is hungry they will just get down to the business of eating and not mess around with the biting part. This biting thing is also a phase and does not mean that a baby will bite every time you nurse from then on, so there’s no need to wean if you’re not ready.
Stay tuned for more on what to do with older babies who are rowdy while nursing. There’s more coming on that topic in the next blog post.